Thursday, September 6, 2007

Psssttt... Hey Maria, It's Me, God - Are you Listening?

On a regular basis, I look for other countries to "switch" our adoption to that will be a faster way to bring Ellie home.

I am not a patient person. I never have been.

I continue to question God regularly on why He is making me wait so long for Ellie.

NOW... keep in mind, I DO trust God. I know He is in control, and I WILL wait, but I'm like the kid you tell you will take to Chuck E. Cheese later on in the day. I will constantly ask, "Is it time to go yet? When are we going? What time is it? Can we leave now?" I've just GOT to be annoying to God; I'm annoying to myself sometimes.

So, yesterday I looked and looked at other countries. I even seriously considered Guatemala for a while -- until I read they are having serious problems there with the US Government advising potential adoptive families not to adopt from there at the present. There are issues surrounding baby trafficking, potential of birthmoms being coerced into releasing their children and possibility of inappropriate "donations" being made in exchange for services. *sigh* So very, very sad that people will turn adoption into something ugly. But... I digress.

This pretty much was a door slamming so I said, "OK" -- again.

And then, today... I was flipping through some sale magazine I got in the mail -- some company called Treasures of the Heart (this SHOULD have been my first clue). I get to a page with a picture frame that said, "Love is a Miracle Worth Waiting For" and in it is an ultrasound photo of a baby. The name written under it was ... "Ellie" (of course, are we surprised???). At the SAME time, I look up on TV and they are advertising the upcoming start of Survivor China. Coincidence? I don't think so. I just said, "Ok, I get the hint."

I know God -- I hear you! Go brush the man's hair. For those of you who have heard this story from Beth Moore, you are fully aware of what I'm saying here. If you haven't -- email me, call me, ask me. I hope it makes you cry like it does me everytime I hear it.

Everytime I try to look elsewhere, He thunks me on the head and says, "I told you -- WAIT" And I have to reply, "I'm trying, God, but it's HARD and I wwwaaaannnttt it now!!!" (I'm whining as I say this, I'm sure). God just shakes his head and says, "Kids -- you raise them right and this is what you get. Where did I go wrong with this one???"


PS -- On a more positive note, the Lands (see link to right) are leaving in the morning to go to Taiwan to get Reed. I know they are just in happy happy land (pun intended) right now. I can't wait until they come home!!

1 comment:

Jeff, Abbey, and Reed Land said...

Hey Maria,

We are in very happy land right now! In about 12 hours we will make the journey from our hotel in Taipei to pick up our son in Feng Yuan.